After having kids my hormones have been super out of whack.
I slept poorly (even long after my kids were sleeping through the night), & I had painful periods.
(What a weird word, "period," but I have to admit even though every woman menstruates, I still find talking about it "publicly" is a bit awkward...and when I'm with friends I'm either crass or ridiculously casual!!! Kinda like when I go to my lady parts doc and I wanna say "My puss has been feelin' this." Or "My twat has been doing that." but DUDE, I can't say "PUSS" or "TWAT" to my DOCTOR!!!! SO then I feel obliged to say vagina, which I NEVER use in my regular life, and it's all just so awkward.)
Anyway... It got my thinking about hormones and the role they play in so many people's lives. I love to say that hormones make most of the decisions, and hormones always win.
This is true. Hormones are often why we can't resist sugar/fat/salt. Crazy but true. Stress and junk food both send our hormones on their own little rollercoaster and both end up with cravings that we literally can't resist. That's why willpower has nothing to do with weight loss. Which is why you should take my quiz and find out who is actual culprit!
I am SO grateful I got some amazing help from a naturopath and an herbal remedy that has basically resolved my hormone issues! Yes, sweet sweet sleep is my friend again (for the most part... I still get interrupted more than I like and have hard time going back to sleep after my child asks me to hold his tissue while he blows his nose at 2am... but at least I don't wane up randomly anymore).
But I know that for many women I meet and clients I work with, hormones play a role... and more often than not it is stress hormones. Which is why I'm super excited about my new quiz to help you figure out which of the most common culprits are causing all of YOUR problems! Find out who YOU get to blame!
And then, of course, let me know!!!!!
I'm talking about Chakras.
The body wisdom I'm talking about is super simple techniques to get in touch with your own body and its wisdom. It's not yoga, even though I went ahead and mentioned chakras finally. There is some overlap in that yoga is definitely based on body wisdom as well. But what I'm showing you here and in my other Body Wisdom videos is much simpler than that. It's just ways ways to feel better and know yourself better, which helps with SO MANY things in life.
I realize chakras have a lot to tell us, but that's not what this particular post is about ;) Chakras capture huge ideas and potential - about abundance, pleasure, and more. But at a minimum, they also just refer to a basic area of the body. So even if the idea of chakras weird you out, just go with it. I'm introducing a way to relax and improve the health of your entire lower abdomen / lower back area...summed up as the sacral chakra :)
Oh yeah, the all important self care. The thing we all sacrifice to take care of other people, to work a little harder on our job, to get ahead a bit faster, or sometimes just to get by. But it really is essential to take care of ourselves. That's what this body wisdom can teach us - simple ways to get in touch and give a bit of care.
Take Me To Bed
Okay, not really, but take this idea to bed. I literally had NO self care and had only excuses when my physical therapist would ask why I didn't do my neck exercises, or whey I stayed up too late working, or why I felt like shit all the time. And then I realized I could do all these amazing self care routines IN BED!!!!! It changed my life.
I stretch laying down; I meditate laying down; I journal laying down... I basically do all my self care laying down!! It's amazing.
And of course... let me know what YOU feel when you give this a try!!!!
Take me to bed with you... for real!!!
And do this simple secret before you go to sleep.
Just kidding. Actually, it's so simple you can watch it and then go to bed after, because the blue light from your screen is bad for your sleep (and likely adds anxiety).
We Are All Stressed
This simple secret is a fantastic antidote for 21st century stress - the stress you feel, your friends feel, your husband/wife/partner feels, your colleagues feel... and sadly almost all of us feel.
While it manifests in different ways - anxiety, depression, general stress, even anger - the chronic demands society puts on us, and our inability to create the community we need to counteract those demands, adds up!
Hold Your Heart
In this simple technique (technique is too complicated(, you literally hold your heart. We all need a bit more nurturing in our lives, and this is a way to give it to yourself.
Add a Twist
You can really amp up the relaxation by adding a simple twist. Turn your knees to the right and hold your heart; turn your knees to the left and hold your fake heart (right side).
Take Me to Bed
This is why I tell people to take these videos to bed!!! They are soooooo simple and relaxing and really help you detach from some of the day before you head off to sleep.
I totally sucked at self care until I started doing my self care in bed!!! All the things I love to do that make me feel great: journaling, reading, stretching, body wisdom, meditation (I do it laying down), self massage, and other things all happen in bed. And frankly, I really never could get them into my life until I figured this secret out!
So while you may not want to actually take your screen to bed (like I said, the light it emits is bad for your sleep), you should take these ideas to bed and give them a try!!!
And of course, let me know when you do!!!
Have a friend who feels anxiety? Be sure to share this video!!!
Thinking about getting botox?
Yeah, I was, too.
And then I did.
This is what I learned.
Why do you want botox?
First of all, make sure you consider the reasons you are seeking botox. This should not be something you are doing because you are worried about what other people think. You need to make sure you're coming from a healthy place.
What are your expectations?
The botox might not give you the results you are hoping for. I got it 4 times and only once did I feel truly satisfied with it. And it wasn't the last time, or I'd probably be getting it again! haha!
How does your body react to things?
Are you sensitive? I am. I'm honestly not that surprised that I got a headache from the treatment, despite that I didn't realize it for the first three times due to extenuating circumstances around my neck causing headaches in the time frame I got the first three rounds. So, if you are sensitive, you might have side effects that don't make it worth it.
What's the bottom line?
Honestly, go for it if you want to. We are all vain in certain ways - our clothes, our makeup, our hair, our shoes, our purses... whatever. Maybe botox will help soften up some lines that bug you. Or maybe it won't. In the end, you only know what you'll get if you try it, and if you go into with the right attitude, you'll be able to confidently decide whether or not it's worth it to you.
What about emotional eating?
And, as always, what does this have to do with emotional eating???? EVERYTHING!
It's ALL connected, and we are all susceptible to vain thoughts.
If we live in fear of people finding out we are vain, or discovering we got botox, or not getting botox but wishing we had... we are shutting down our emotions and making ourselves susceptible to numbing by any means... whether overeating, over drinking, smoking, gambling, having too much sex, drugs, or whatever unhealthy behavior we use to forget our pain as being out of alignment and under stress.
By addressing ourselves WHOLLY, even our vanity and other "weaknesses", embracing them, and accepting them for what they are, we can make choices that leave us feeling our best, no matter if we get the botox or not.
What do you think? Have you thought about botox? Have you tried it?
Yup. That's right. I'm talking about Aunt Flo.
Your Body & Your Emotional Eating
Welcome to the first in my body wisdom series!!! It's not yoga. It's definitely not exercise. It's just simple ways to get in touch with your body and treat it better.
What does this have to do with emotional eating? A lot, actually. It's that disconnect between body, heart, and mind that leads to emotional eating. And it's when we try to "fix" our food problems without listening to our bodies that the problems get worse.
So the next time you get your moon, you are menstruating, or Aunt Flo comes to visit... Take a nap. Tell everyone to leave you alone. Even if it's just ten minutes. Just be. Be still. Relax those tense muscles. It makes such a huge difference!!!!
Oh, and drink some extra water!!!! I forgot to say that on the video :)
And of course, after you make it a point to lay around a little during "that time of the month" let me know how it makes you feel!!!
I know I've felt less worn out when I've been able to do little period power naps.
In the health world people like to talk about holiday weight gain. It's a lie.
Happy New Year!!!!
The truth is that holiday weight loss can happen just as easily as holiday weight gain. And even if you do gain weight, it's not the 7 pounds average other so-called gurus are trying to scare you with. Holiday weight gain statistics are not that stark.
But if your new year's resolution weight loss goals feel at odds with the new year's weight loss statistics, then rest easy.
I have a different kind of weight loss plan.
This is not like a weight loss challenge, where you try to starve yourself and obsessively watch the scale. This is not a series of weight loss tips that work for a while, and then someone stop working. This isn't even really a weight loss program, because there are no rules, nothing to give up, nothing to stop eating.
This IS an approach to weight loss that works. It is one of the healthiest, easiest, and fastest ways to lose eight that STAYS off.
This IS a "program" that allows you to eat every single food you love, without restriction or ever feeling hungry.
Don't start at the end
Most health advice is totally backwards. It starts off by telling you what to eat, what not to eat, and counting all kinds of numbers. BORING!
I don't waste your time with any of that nonsense.
Okay okay, it's not total nonsense. There are times when focusing on specific things in your diet and counting specific numbers are really important. But for the VAST MAJORITY of people who simply want to lose weight and look and feel their best... it is not necessary to count anything, and in fact it will backfire, ruin your so called "Diet" and end up making you eat more junk food in the long term.
Because it's more than boring to count all those numbers, it's depressing and it is a distraction from what is actually going on in your body and mind.
I help my clients forget all that BAD advice and create their own personal whole body connection!
Don't Let the Products Guide You
This is actually how we got into such a mess with all the counting in the first place!!!
Food manufacturers have one goal: sell as much as their product as possible, which they do by getting you to eat as much as possible. #sadbuttrue
Just like numbers, reading about the "health claims" on food actually disconnect you from your own desire, and puts some idea about what you "should" be doing into your mind instead.
Looking at the package separates your from your body and your intuition.
And also buy quality foods with the shortest ingredient list possible, and simply "ingredients" whenever you can as well. That makes it WAY easier to the whole trusting your body thing.
Forget ALL The Rules & Restrictions
Yup. I said it.
Forget ALL the rules. Because rules and food just don't go together.*
(*As always, please trust and follow your doctor's medical advice because there are always exceptions to the rules, even the rule that you shouldn't have any rules.)
The truth is that everyone is preaching about what you should or shouldn't eat.
But no berry from the amazon is going to make you live forever, just as one bag of hot cheetos isn't going to kill you.
And, worse yet, all the mixed messages and crazy hype about the good and evil foods of the world actually just cause us to feel stressed and overwhelmed, and end up causing us to make BAD decisions.
Again, all this damn information DISCONNECTS us from our bodies! We just can't tune in when we have to think so freaking much!! And when we are disconnected we grab the cookies or the chocolate or the whatever and eat it... and then we feel SO BAD about it!!!
Allowing yourself to eat freely actually FREES you to eat WELL.
Stop FIghting With Yourself
As soon as you tell yourself,
“You can never eat _____” …
it is guaranteed that another part of you will start demanding ____!
This sets you up to sabotage ALL your efforts!
Any approach to health based on all those rules and restrictions we just talked about? This will always lead you to battle within yourself, and when you battle yourself... YOU always lose.
Oh, also, when you are fighting with yourself? You can't tune in, which we've talked about is really important.
Also, any time you hear yourself saying "Should" means you are fighting with yourself. Should with food is always a judgmental statement.
I should stop eating sugar.
I should choose the low carb/fat/whatever menu item.
I should not eat that delicious thing.
I should eat that thing I don't really want but think will help me lose wight.
Those are all ways of telling yourself that you suck and you don't deserve what you want. I know this because I used be in a world of shoulds. I broke free from that kind of approach, and I want to help every woman do the same thing now. When you connect your food to your desire, there is no more should.
So, tune in to those shoulds. When you hear yourself saying you "should" then what you "should" do is take a pause and check in with yourself.
This is the #1 Most Toxic Thing In Your Diet
This is the ONE thing that actually causes us to gain weight, whether at the holidays or any other time of year.
This one thing causes us to...
•Eat more sugar
•Feel bad about ourselves
It's not sugar, artificial colors, saturated fat, or any other ingredient.
The #1 most toxic thing in your diet is guilt!
Yup, guilt is at the heart of almost all emotional eating. And it also contributes to mindless eating, too (the close cousin on emotional eating).
Restrictive programs should be shunned as a miserable way to achieve health goals.
There is room for every food you love when you focus on the joy and not the calories.
When You Love Every Bite…
You don’t feel guilty when you choose to eat a cupcake or get take out because you know it’s the right thing for you right then.You are empowered to make EXACTLY the right choice for you.
So stop blaming yourself
Its simple and life changing to stop blaming yourself for the emotional eating and binges.
Ready to get started???
With my quiz it's simple and also FUN. Because now that you know it's not your fault, you get to find out whose fault it is!!!
Fifteen years ago I struggled with recurring throat and lung infections. The doctors prescribed antibiotics even though I tested negative for strep every time and they could not tell me what was causing them.
(Yeah, strep throat that was NOT actually strep throat... so what the hell was it? Read on.)
So I found an MD who practiced alternative health. He gave me better solutions for dealing with the infections... but had no advice on how to prevent them.
So I found an traditional chinese medicine doctor who was an amazing overall healer... and she told me to STOP EATING SUGAR.
(But in a really nice way, because she was such a nice lady.)
And at the time that SHOCKED ME. I mean, I ate super healthy! (Except for the sugar.)
And to be honest, I did not do it. Because I was, actually, pretty addicted to sugar.
But I started working towards it. I looked at hidden sugars.
I started coming up with sugar alternatives, to do when I wanted sugar instead of sugar.
And it took a long time, and in the beginning it was a real struggle.
But slowly, with a lot of self work on what the heck that love of sugar was really about (beside the fact that dessert is delicious), I transformed that relationship with sugar to one that is really healthy.
Do I still eat sugar? Hell yes! I'd never tell anyone to stop eating anything they enjoy.
Can I get an Amen to that???
And yet, I had to shift that dynamic. It wasn't serving me and it was only creating problems with my body.
It was a substitute for certain lack I felt in my life. I had a wound that I couldn't tell you where it came from. I had a sadness that didn't really make sense considering how generally awesome my life was. I felt a loneliness in the world that couldn't be explained because I was surrounded by creative loving friends. And I turned to sugar to cheer me up.
& It was contributing to recurring INFECTIONS!
But as I slowly slowly, over the course of years, came to terms with my love of sugar and learned when I actually wanted to eat something sweet or when I just needed something to distract me or cheer me up, those infections did slowly fade away with time as well. Thankfully!
And I still get to eat sugar!
Manage specific health concerns like losing the extra weight or getting rid of the aches, pains, or even infections by upgrading your nutrition and self care.
Transform your relationship with food into a positive force in your life.
Turn your food talk into a friend and ally (instead of a judge, informant, mean girl, or police).
Whatever your personal concerns, my program is 100% customized to help you take baby steps towards the health goal you wish to achieve. I've helped women with all of the above and more. My program is not for everyone. I do not offer quick fixes. Change does not happen fast. But you can transform your health with improved nutrition, quality of food, exercise you love to do, and self care that makes you feel great EVERY day!
Because my strep throat was NOT actually strep throat. It was my body telling me to stop eating sugar.
So what could your extra few pounds or whatever concern brought you here be your body telling you?
Get started on figuring this all out by taking my quiz! Because eating the cookies (or hot cheetos or whatever) is NOT your fault. Take the quiz... and find out who to blame!
I want to challenge something right now.
It might be uncomfortable. I want to challenge the idea that portion control is a healthy way to eat.
Because I understand, as a total control freak my self, the temptation to try to control what I eat.
(The funny thing is that I used to consider my self "Type B." I actually thought I was super laid back, didn't worry too much about things, could go with the flow.
However, having children made me realize that I'm actually extremely controlling! It's just that before kids I was successfully controlling most of my world... and then I had kids and have been basically white-knuckling the edge of the table since they were born, staring in amazement because my mind is blown that I am so unable to control things now.
Sooooo.... it was more like I could be all relaxed and "Type B" because I was so damn good at being Type A that I didn't even know it!)
Also, I used to try to control what I ate. And, interestingly, for a long time that was also out of my control. And it was a real challenge in my life.
The things in my life that felt shitty (in hindsight, basically all the things I could not control), made me want to eat sugar.
I'd try to NOT eat sugar, fail, and then just eat more sugar.
And in my business now I connect with many women who share that they feel that way about many other types of food as well, sometimes all food.
Sometimes they find that portion control has helped them maintain a healthy weight.
However, there are two ways to go about portion control.
The first way, the more common way, is that some external measurement determines the portion. Whether calories, volume/weight, carbs, points, or whatever, this can backfire. It's useful to learn what an average portion might be. But if you are hungry, you may need more than average, and if you are not hungry, you may need less than average.
The second, more empowering, way is to trust your body as the guide. When your body is telling you what the portion should be, it will be just the right amount. And the beautiful thing is that when your body is able to get exactly what it needs to be satisfied, you are able to ENJOY the portions, not simply control them.
It is my mission to help women create this holistic whole body connection in a playful, non-judgmental, and supportive environment, so they can enjoy all the foods they love.
Last week I did a guided meditation at a new moon goddess circle. It was a guided meditation to go through a variety of symbolic visualizations, and after we experienced the guided meditation, we were then informed what each visual symbolized.
It started with a harbor, which represents my social life. I visualized three different kind of boats, which makes sense because I like a lot of types of social experiences. Then the boat we got on represents how we view ourselves... lucky for me, mine was a luxury yacht!!!! Hahaha!
So on and on it went, and I had a positive experience through the variety of visualizations, with no major surprises when what each visualization was supposed to represent was revealed.
At the very end of the meditation, we are visualizing laying in a natural space - mine was under a real tree in my grandfather's (now my parents') backyard, and "One of God's creatures comes to visit." Not surprising my totem animal came to visit: butterflies.
They also had a message for me. And my message was... Belly button???
Yes. It was. My message was "Belly button." I always knew I was quirky girl, but what the?
Ok, actually... it makes total sense because I've been thinking in terms of what the body might symbolize in our life, and so I knew that my message was not SIMPLY Belly Button, but rather a question of what Belly Button means!
So I've had the chance to contemplate this, which is of course the point of a guided meditation, to keep thinking about what insights I gained afterward.
And a belly button is interesting. It is actually a scar. It's a scar from being disconnected from your source of life!!!!!
But it's also a symbol that I have a mother; that we all have a mother. It's an opportunity to remember where I came from.
It's a symbol of a truly amazing organ: the umbilical cord. The umbilical cord is a twisted rope that takes the blood vessels from a baby and winds them around with the blood vessels from the mother (via the placenta), and the blood vessels get so closely intertwined that the nourishment from the mother's blood is transferred to the growing baby's blood!!!
It's truly amazing.
And once disconnected, the veins that give a child life are simply absorbed into the body. Even that can be symbolic, that we take the source of life from OTHER and we begin to nourish ourselves.
So I'll take that message! I love that message, in fact. I love what Belly Button says to me. What does it say to you?????
I just want to say this: YOU ARE STRESSED OUT!
Stress is THE most common thing I see that drives people to feel like crap. WE don’t even re alize we are stressed. Because it begins with the new job. Then that feels manageable… and then our whoever does whatever. Okay, well that’s under control. Then someone starts asking us favors. Then our car has issues. And this is how stress creeps up on us, one step at a time, in a culture where it’s really no “OKAY” to relax, take a break, slow down, and if you are a woman, to say no.
And the stress hormones make it impossible for us to make good decisions. It actually shuts down that part of your brain.
SO our stress makes us eat bad. And our stress makes it feel impossible to meal plan. And our stress make us think we can never change anything, much less change everything we want to.
So we get stuck. We rely on the old habits more. We get more take out.
If we want to make change ,we beat ourselves up for not doing it… or for trying and failing.
It’s a painful place to live, stressed out, eating junk, and beating ourselves up over it all.
The beautiful thing is that we don’t have to “add one more thing” onto our busy lives to change things.
We don’t have to go to the gym every day, or eat some special protein bar, or give up all the foods we love.
In fact we need MORE of what we love. What we REALLY love. Because we don’t get enough of that.
When we choose what we LOVE, and allow ourselves to enjoy it, we actually make more space to start making healthier choices that make us feel our best.
And slowly, over a few weeks or months, we can eliminate the things that feel bad, and add the things that feel good. And we will lose weight, and enjoy what we are eating! And we can do it FOREVER.
I specialize in helping women overcome emotional eating and sugar addiction, and I overcame that battle myself. Stress leads us to choose junk and sweets, then sweets make us eat more sweets.
You have to get off the hormone roller coaster that is driving your brain right now.
And to do that you have to start with stress management.
Then you add a dose of forgiveness,
And you focus on counting joy (not calories).
What would this would like in your life?
I help busy, ambitious women connect their food to their desires & overcome emotional eating in a non-judgmental, supportive environment.